We were lying in bed about to go to sleep and Alistair turns to me and says: I think we need a chat. In the course of our five years together I have hardly heard him say these words. Perhaps it is because we make a point of having a 'check-in' most days, where we share what is arising for us in our awareness. It only takes 5-10minutes, usually in the car on the way to work, and is a great way to stay connected, removing a lot of the guessing or concern that might otherwise br

I’m feeling totally blessed to be able to listen to my partner share what she believes to be the the most significant fear she has experienced in her relationships with men. She did that recently. And it’s not what I imagined. I imagined it might be aggression or physical violence or abusive language. What she told me was that, for her, her greatest fear is to not feel safe in sexual intimacy. She let me know that she needs to be able to say ‘no’ to my advances. She needs to